Myth: Women want jewelry, chocolates, and flowers and can be bought off with such.
Truth: Women want information.
Case in point #1: If a man brings a woman flowers, what’s her response?
a) what’s this for?
b) what did you do?
c) what’s the occasion?
Case in point #2: Planning fieldwork.
What does a man ask?
a) what time do I need to show up?
What does a woman ask?
a) what time do I need to show up? what do I need to bring? who’s paying for my food? where are we staying? are the rooms clean? are the rooms quiet? do I have my own bathroom? do the locks on the doors work? what are the pillows like? can I bring my own? what time do we meet for breakfast? what should I pack for lunch and how? do I need to worry about bears? how do I cope with bears? when are we done for the day? who pays for food? do we all meet for supper? can I go do my own thing at night? when are we coming home?
Men – ditch the gifts, unless they are truly motiveless and unconditional. An unconditional gift is good for the giver as well as the receiver. Giving her information shows respect and that you consider her an equal.
Women – respect your need for information; it allows you to be in control of your life. Tell him that you need information rather than laying on a guilt trip. No need to pay forward the 2000 years of self-worth issues we have hanging over us. Information is good for everyone.